Cock Envy
by KittenKin
Summary: Fai whines to Yuui about how mean Kurogane can be sometimes about sharing. Earth-ish AU in which both twins are alive and happy. PG-13 for implied KuroFai and some questionable language from Fai.


"I don't _know_," Fai whined, his upper body sprawled out bonelessly across the polished surface of their kitchen table in a maximum effort to express the extent of his utter lack of will to live to his brother. "I just _want_ it."

"Kurogane won't even give you the time of day based on that sort of reasoning, much less give you what you _really_ want," Yuui laughed in reply, setting down a mug of steaming coffee right in front of the petulant pouter's face.

Though younger, Yuui was generally the more responsible and reasonable one, making the business decisions and keeping their little restaurant running through all the many ups and downs of a small farming community. Their customers were loyal and there was a steady stream of truckers who provided income as well, but their main body of customers were dependent upon such fickle gods as the weather and insects for their wealth. When times were tough for the farmers, times were equally tough for the Fluorite brothers.

Yuui managed it well, however, with steady nerves and keen foresight. He directed matters at home, too, keeping distractible Fai occupied with a constant flow of requests for assistance - never orders, never commands, and never needing to be such - and keeping his older brother's sense of humor and impulsive nature from getting them into too much trouble with a combination of wit, luck and mutual affection. Their little home was neat and tidy, their not-so-little vegetable garden equally neat and tidy, their large flock of hens fat and laying well, and the two men contentedly busy.

Yuui might have seemed like the dominant twin of the little household, but in truth Fai was just as much in charge, only of different things. He added extra splashes of color and character to their charming little cafe, left little love notes for his brother all about the house, served as liaison to all of their vendors both corporate and casual, and shared in all the work.

Fai was in charge of making and keeping Yuui happy. Yuui was in charge of everything else. It might seem like an unequal workload to an outsider but since Fai's work made Yuui's possible, the twins felt instinctively that it balanced out neatly.

"I just want it," Fai repeated, lower lip jutting out as he lifted his chin off of the table and glared at the unsympathetic treatment he was given. Pout pout pout.

"Well who wouldn't?" the other blond responded easily, apparently in the mood to humor and tease. He swept gracefully about the kitchen, going from refrigerator to stove to sink and back again, never stopping but never rushing. His movements were graceful and elegant even when he was doing something as simple and mundane as separating egg yolks, and Fai often quipped that Yuui - and their restaurant's open kitchen layout - was the reason this sleepy agricultural community held on so well so its young people, where other such places invariably suffered a slow and constant bleed out of their newer generations, losing them to the bright lights and empty promises of nearby cities.

"Who wouldn't?!" Fai cried in mimicry, straightening up and drawing his coffee close as he mused enthusiastically over his latest obsession. "It's perfect! Best in town."

"And you've been 'round to them all to compare?" Yuui asked, throwing his brother a raised eyebrow over one shoulder as he stirred up omelets.

"Best in the county!" Fai continued, ignoring his brother's look and query. "Best in the state. Best in show. I want to give it a blue ribbon. No, a gold medal on a silk ribbon. Throw it right over that jaunty head and drop a congratulatory kiss on it. 'Top Cock' maybe?" There was a sputter from the stove, and Yuui turned around with his hands on his hips.

"I think a more respectful term-"

"-is God's gift!" Fai crowed, bowling right over Yuui's mini-lecture. "To both men and women. Everyone old enough to appreciate that masterwork. It's so _big_. I bet I could throw a leg over that thing and just ride it off into the sunset."

"I think there are some young things around here who've thought the same." Yuui laughed lightly and began harvesting some herbs from the pots on the windowsills.

"I swear I can see that thing from a mile away," Fai continued, hardly heeding his beloved brother. "Not that I want to be that far. I can much better admire its size...oh, and those _contours_ - seriously, a masterpiece - and even color. Everything about it is perfect! My God I just want to...to...to grab it and cheekrub it and then-"

Yuui cut off the flow of details with a perfectly timed fluffy forkful of egg and diced vegetables, lightly seasoned with salt, pepper and fresh herbs. Fai immediately fell to blissful chewing, but once he'd given his brother's cooking its full share of appreciation, he returned to waxing lyrical over their neighbor's - in Fai's mind and language - most valuable asset.

"He's so mean about it," Fai pouted in conclusion, after a few more minutes of florid - _torrid_ - praise. "I've asked him so nicely-"

"I think Kurogane called it 'whining and crying like a milk pup who couldn't find a teat'."

"-and I even offered to pay him-"

"He has his pride and principles, Fai. If he wouldn't give it up for free he certainly isn't going to let money sway him. You probably really offended him."

"...yeah. He yelled at me." The older twin wilted onto the kitchen table again, looking up at his sibling with a mournful, hangdog expression. "Said to keep my hands off if I didn't want them broken, and my eyes up or away entirely or he'd knock 'em out of my head, and then he ordered me off his farm. With his shotgun."

"Your hands...Fai, what did you do?"

"Nothing! Well, almost nothing. I just wanted to touch it at least once. It looks like it'd be so..._nice_." A dreamy smile overtook Fai's face and Yuui sighed in exasperation as he stood hipshot by the stove.

"You know," the elder continued, "smooth and silky, then just a little rough as your hand keeps going..."

"You're incorrigible."

"I'm _sad_," Fai protested. "I want it. I really, really want it. I want it more than anything and he's so stubborn-" (here a snort from Yuui) "-and won't listen-" (and an eyebrow) "-and I don't know what to do anymore! Yuuuuuiii, _help_." (Eye roll.)

"Eat your eggs," Yuui said firmly, setting down a plate containing an omelet and potatoes. "And after you're done, will you go on ahead of me and open up the restaurant by yourself? I want to run an errand first."

"Of course," Fai agreed, as he always did when Yuui asked him to do anything. He began tucking into his meal but frowned, distracted from both his whining and his breakfast by a twinge of brotherly protectiveness. "But where are you going?"

"I'm going to take that pot pie I made last night to Kurogane, all wrapped up in an apology for my brother's shamelessness," Yuui said chidingly, but then turned and smiled at the miscreant. "Along with an invitation to supper. There's more than one way to skin a cat, Fai."

"Or to win a cock?" his twin suggested hopefully, making Yuui roll his eyes again.

"_Cockerel_," the younger corrected. "Honestly, the way you go around talking about getting your hands on Kurogane's 'cock' makes it sound like you're desperately trying to get into our neighbor's _pants_, not wheedle his prize rooster away so we can improve our flock."

"Maybe I'm doing both," his sibling replied with a cheeky grin.

"_Fai!_"

* * *

**Author's Notes: **Written in response to a request at the Dreamwidth community CLAMPkink that read, "Farmer Kurogane has the biggest, shiniest, most gorgeous cock in town. Fai is fascinated by its color and rebellious behavior - quite like its owner. Kurogane calls his little friend ginryuu (despite the rooster being black)."


End file.
